Members of the THPL community are problem solvers, high achievers, and doers to name just a few descriptive traits. And connected to this kind of behavioral description is typically a bias towards talking. I would attribute, the bias to talking, to the fact that each member of the community has put a lot of time and effort into their area of focus, whether it be Life, Learning, or Fitness (or all three) and this culminates in a need to share what we have learned in hopes that we can help others with their THPL journey. And often sharing is a very good thing. We all like to hear about the latest greatest method for becoming faster or smarter (or…..), it certainly helps shorten the learning curve and improves the probability of success. The issue is that this approach, when implemented is one-sided and it misses one of the key elements of learning and growing and that is listening. Yes, listening…. to concentrate on what someone is saying, to pay attention to, to make an effort are all attributes of effective listening.
And if so powerful then what is it about listening that is so hard? Do we not realize how good it is for “the talker” to have someone to listen to them? Are we so full of ourselves that we cannot spare some of our time to listen? Or maybe we were never really trained in good listening skills and the power of listening. I might think that it is just like anything we do. To get better at it we need to dream a new way, set a plan, practice it and then do it (for real). It might even take a few times till we are good at it. We cannot rush the process when listening and we cannot solve the problem by interrupting. Listening is active, not passive, and so there is no need, unless requested, to push your way in. In fact, many times, the person only wants to be heard and know someone cares – they can fix their challenge on their own – they just do not want to be on their own.
So, the next strand of the journey is being hooked up and it is called Listening. Use it frequently and you will find incredible benefit for both parties. No question this is a higher level of THPL and one that we all need to strive towards. Remember – listen more than you talk and success and friendship will take care of themselves
Loving life, especially when I am listening
Ciao
joe